“When you replace “why is this happening to me” with “what is this trying to teach me?” Everything shifts.” – Anon
I came across this quote on the streets of LinkedIn. I couldn’t find who it is attributed to but whoever it is, sure had (or have) a good head on their shoulders.
We’ve all at some point had that inner voice saying, “why me?” or “what’s wrong with me?” This is particularly true when things aren’t going as per our expectations. A relationship isn’t getting along as you hoped. Out of so many colleagues, your job is declared redundant. You or a loved one gets a difficult diagnosis. Going through changes and new experiences can be daunting and frustrating. It is easy to play the victim and ask “why me?”
Rather than dwell on the situation and play victim, we are being reminded to focus on the opposite, more positive angle. The opportunities for growth and new experiences that lie ahead. It is true our lives are continually in flux, and it’s not always going to be a walk in the park. If it were, we would never learn. For we are a sum of all of our life’s experiences – good or bad. And the only way to learn is by boldly asking, “what can I learn from this?”.
This positive U-turn determines your REACTION. And we have all heard the famous saying, “Life is 10% of what happens and 90% of how you react to it.” It is true. Reacting with light instead of shade, with responsibility instead of blame and in the future not the past, means the battle is already won.
So, forget about “why is this happening to me” and shift your focus and energy to “what is this trying to teach me?”
Someone also sent me a message about replacing “I’m sorry” with “thank you”. For example, instead of saying, “sorry I’m late”, say “thank you for waiting for me”. Instead of saying, “sorry for taking up all your time”, say “thank you for spending time with me”. While “sorry” exposes your weakness, “thank you” acknowledges the other person and their contribution.
I am sure “sorry” has its place, but for now I need to unlearn one of the essential magic words. It’s time to shift. Positivity and gratitude over negativity!